Category: Reviews

The Boys will be boring

The Boys will throw you for a loop if you think satire has to be LOL funny. It doesn’t, and The Boys isn’t. I had to look up the definition to make sure. “The use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people’s stupidity or vices, particularly in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues.”

Based in a world where superheroes are marketable corporate assets, The Boys holds a mirror up to modern society and you won’t like the reflection. The joke is us. We are the punchline when Homelander lets a plane crash to gin up enough xenophobia to convince the government to let superheroes fight in the military. We are mocked when Queen Maeve agrees to turn being outed (by Homelander) into a marketing campaign. We are the ones made to look like fools for wanting The Deep to get a second chance.

Anyone who puts any thought into what they’re watching is going to feel icky after watching The Boys. Kudos to the show for such biting satire. At times it does feel forced, especially with Stormfront in season two. But you forgive. 

I’m only thru two of the three seasons, and I liked the second better. Sssssssort of. The thing about The Boys that I can’t get past is how unique and thoughtful the superhero storylines are but how cliche and boring “the boys” storyline is. Everything interesting about this show happens when the superhero characters are onscreen. 

(To back up, the title “The Boys” comes from the name of the group of characters who are out to expose the superheroes as frauds. I’ll use lowercase to refer to the characters and uppercase to refer to the show.)

The boys are boring af. There is nothing to the Billy Butcher character other than his obsessive use of the C-word, which gets old after the first six hundred times he says it. Hughie is supposed to be the one we identify with. Can’t. We’re supposed to believe he goes from a limp-spined nobody to a vengeful mercenary because his girlfriend was killed in his hands (literally. It’s very gory.)? Don’t believe it for a second. The rest of the boys aren’t worth wasting pixels on. 

Watching The Boys reminds me of something a sportswriter once said about the athletes he covers, “We don’t know these people.” The Boys introduces us to our heroes and they are not good people. They do awful things, they lie to us and we idolize them anyway. 

The Boys would be better if the boys were just as interesting. Instead they’re boring and the show suffers. I don’t recommend this as a priority show for you. The best use case is for long flights or when you’ve got an hour to kill here and there. Not a show worth bingeing. 

Review: For All Mankind Not For Anyone

First we were like why is Apple making a Walkman then we were like why is Apple making a phone then we were like why is Apple making a watch now we’re like why is Apple making a television show. After watching the first two episodes of “For All Mankind” I’m still not sure about that last one. 

Several things can make a television show boring. Uninteresting characters, flat storylines, weak dialogue. No single one of those makes Mankind boring, but they all play some part. Instead the show comes up short because it’s alt-history with no stakes. 

For All Mankind takes place in a universe where the Soviets put the first man on the moon. That’s…it. First man, surface of moon. Congrats. The story begins shortly before and takes place mostly after this…after America lost the race to the moon. By like a month. Oh yeah, we got there. Buzz and Neil put Eagle down on the Sea of Tranquility and all that but the soundbite. 

Who thought that was alt enough to make alt-history out of??? For All Mankind gives us no “So what?” to make us care why history didn’t unfold the way we know it did. The only consequence so far to losing the space race has been the ouster of the head of the space program. Whoopee. Am I supposed to be enthralled by Richard Nixon’s quest for a fall guy? 

I’m not. Not even a little bit.

Compare this to The Man in the High Castle. That show has stakes: The end of our country. Japan and Nazi Germany control what used to be the United States of America. That’s alt-history. What happened matters intensely to the characters and in fact the entire world around them. What happened in For All Mankind barely even matters to the people it happened to because the Apollo space program continues undeterred. Wait, sorry, one mopey astronaut had to do desk duty for a while before they let him fly on Apollo 15. My deepest apologies.

No, this show is a dud. 

How this could have been compelling? Here are some ways For All Mankind could have higher stakes:

  • Losing the race to the moon causes scientific investment to flee the U.S. and flow into Soviet Russia, which props up communism in ways no one thought possible. The motherland soars on the international stage. 
  • Developing countries follow the Soviet Union’s lead, emulating the communist dream that took man to the heavens.
  • America’s standing in the world wanes and its morale at home tanks as its people no longer believe it can achieve great things. 
  • Our collective belief in capitalism suffers, here and around the world. 

Slowly but surely all those things could begin to shape a way for viewers to envision a very different modern world. Then we would have something to care about. When I watch High Castle I feel something. When I watch For All Mankind, I don’t. 

Highs and lows from the Battle of Winterfell

Highs and Lows from the Battle for Winterfell:

Low: Dany
For someone who expects everyone to bend the knee the moment she walks into the room, Dany’s weakness at the Ballte of Winterfell was damning proof of why she shouldn’t sit on it.
When the battle began and she watched the dead snuff the flames a of her Dothraki army, she panicked. Deviating from whatever the plan was, she raced into action. Tactically she put her dragon out of position, which brought Jon’s along with it. Now the living’s two biggest weapons were flying blind, unable to provide any support to the Unsullied or the army of the North. It’s true that the best battle plans fall apart the moment they hit the battle field. But Dany never gave Winterfell a chance, and she’s damn lucky Arya Stark saved the day or else she’d be the mother of three dead dragons.

Dany’s second failure was tactical in the midst of battle. Trying to flame The Night King when she had the chance was the right move. Gotta take the clean shot. But when his retaliatory ice spear missed, she should have turned on a dime and burned the battle field. Instead she flew off to god knows where and have him enough time to raise the dead. Had Dany been there, she could have stopped them in their tracks, giving Jon—a Targaryen—an opportunity to go thru the flames and take out The Night King.

High: The beginning
Hype and anticipation for this episode was off the hook. Beginning the episode with a slow, almost silent tour through the battle preparations brought the fear of death alive.

High: The darkness in the distance
I loved the choice to begin the fight by sending out a Dothraki charge but showing the fight from a distance. The sight of flaming Dothraki swords being engulfed by darkness made everyone awaiting in Winterfell gulp for the terror headed their way. Starting the battle this way helped keep the later fight scenes fresh, too. Loved it.

Low: The battle plan
So…what was the goal with the Dothraki charge? Even with flaming swords they were charging toward certain death that made no dent in their opponents. Seems like a waste of a great fighting force.

High: Arya in the library
Sometimes TV shows make the good guy’s feet a little too quiet. Obviously Arya is well-trained, but is she that quiet? Who cares. This scene kicked ass. It reminded me of the kitchen scene from Jurassic Park and was a good prelude to how she would eventually sneak all the way to The Night King.

Low: Theon
Theron’s death was stupid and futile. A waste of his wasted life. He wasn’t going to defeat TNK, the story would never allow that, but he could have at least fought. Watching him mindlessly charge toward certain death, I felt bad for him in a way I never had. Theon was just plain overmatched in Westeros. He didn’t have the brains, guts or skills to be anything more than the loser he was. Bye.

Low: The crypts
This should have been more terrifying. The people in the crypts knew their fate would be determined by who next opened the door. A friendly face meant another sunrise, a dead face meant death. They never expected that dead face to come from within. Their fear should have overwhelmed the screen. It didn’t. More should have died. We should have come away mad at Jon, Sansa, et al for not realizing they sent their most vulnerable people into a literal death trap.

High: Arya
How cool was it that Arya could sneak up on The Night King from behind amongst all his friends but Jon couldn’t sneak up to him alone on the battlefield? I loved this moment as the culmination of all Arya’s training since season one. And I love that she always thought she was training to take down the names on her list, when in reality she put it to use on someone much more consequential.

But now I have to wonder: Is her story complete? If her role was to develop into a fighter capable of succeeding in that moment, then yes, it is. Can they realistically give her The Night King and Cersei Lannister? I doubt it, and that bodes ill for her future if she goes south.

High: The music.
Fantastic.

Low: Surviving
I agree with those who argued the show lost some credibility by not killing off anyone bigger than Jorah, but I can live with it. However, just one time I would like to see a major character die in a random, non-epic way. Why? Because that’s the way it probably happens some times!

Low: The Hound
From now on when someone cowers during battle we’ll call that pulling a Clegane. He Cleganed it. Come on, man.

Low: The previous episode
The episode before this was one of my favourites for how the main characters gathered and paused before the fight thinking death was certainly near for some, or all of them. With almost all of them surviving, that episode now means less. I am bummed.

It’s time for Jamie Lannister to die. But he probably won’t yet.

A few years ago, the New York Yankees used the phrase “Looking forward, looking back” for their marketing slogan. It’s the typical snottiness you’d expect from America’s most successful and reviled pro sports team.

It could also apply to the latest episode of Game of Thrones. “A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms” brought the past to the present with just about every main character:

        • Sam, Jon and Dolorous Edd stood atop the wall of Winterfell to reminisce about their early days on the Night’s Watch;
        • Jorah had to re-live his failures to Dany in asking her to forgive Tyrion for trusting Cersei;
        • Tyrion reflected to Jamie how much things have changed since their first trip to Winterfell;
        • Tyrion reminded everyone they’d all fought against the Starks at one point or another in their lives;
        • Jon re-wrote Dany’s family history right before her eyes.

And then there’s Jamie. His entire character arc played out in the opening scene: Dany held judgment on his fate for his sins against her family, Bran kept the secret of what he would do for his sister’s love and Brienne put her reputation behind his reformed character. That’s seven seasons of Jamie Lannister in a nutshell.

This led me to ponder when Jamie’s story is destined to end. Did his arc come full circle when he knighted Brienne? I feel like it should have. You can’t ask a character to change more than going from pushing a kid out a window to knighting the woman who saved his life. By all rights, his tale is done and he should die in the battle with the White Walkers. Right?

I can’t believe they’d get rid of him so quickly. And that doesn’t bode well for Brienne because as wonderful as the knighting scene was, there’s zero chance they both make it to episode four.

How do you know there is an afterwards?

This episode also posed a question that’s been rare in Game of Thrones: What happens after the war for the crown? Everyone in this saga is so focused on winning that no one’s thought much about actually governing. Except Sansa, who for my money has become the most electable candidate for the throne, if I may borrow a political term. She responded to Dany’s patronizing attempt at bonding over their mutual love for Jon by asking her point blank what would happen to the North under a Queen Daenerys. Dany didn’t much care for that, and the ice grew thicker between these two.

Others looked ahead, too. Greyworm asked Missandei if she really wants to grow old in Westeros, which surely means he ain’t gonna live to join her on the beaches of Naath. Jorah tried to convince Lyanna to wait in the crypts by telling her she’s the future of House Mormont. You can image how well that went. Even Tyrion got in on the fun, hoping he’d still get to die drunk and horny before admitting it might be as much fun to die and storm Kings Landing as a wight. (By the way, did you catch Jamie lamenting his fighting days are behind him in the same scene? I’m not sayin, I’m just sayin…)

That brings us to the most interesting forward-looking moment of the night. Sam and Jorah brought their relationship full circle when Sam, who was so influenced by Jorah’s father at Castle Black, gave Jorah the Tarly family sword and said, “I’ll see you when it’s through.” But as he was walking away, the last remaining Tarly heir turned to add, “I hope we win,” because he knows they may see each other again regardless.

Brienne, Greyworm, maybe (but not likely) Jamie, maybe (but more likely?) Jorah. Beloved characters are gonna start dying next week. Will we see any of them again as White Walkers?

And now some odd and end thoughts from season eight, episode two…

This will go down as one of my favourite episodes of the series. It had more great scenes than I can count (especially Bran and Jamie in the Godswood), and it was actually funny. Like I legit giggled.

How does a battle with the White Walkers even go? The dead aren’t going to retreat. You have to literally re-kill them all. I can’t fathom the Night King being stupid enough to go after Bran unguarded, so their plan to cut off the army’s head isn’t going to work. And where is ol’ icy eyes anyway???

Sansa’s reunion with Theon felt more emotional and authentic than her reunion with Arya or Jon. They shared some of the lowest moments of their lives together.  It’s wonderful to see them both in better places.

Speaking of Theon, I wonder what Bran knows about his role in the upcoming battle. The nod he gave when Theon asked to protect him was…knowing?

I was basically up off my couch cheering for Arya when she stormed Gendry’s pants. Good for her! A lot of folks on Twitter felt uncomfortable with it given that we met Arya as a child. That’s fair. It didn’t bother me. I guess watching soaps all these years has me used to child stars getting more adult material. But she’s an adult know and she takes what she wants and she wanted Gendry. It felt authentic given the circumstance. I like this loads better than if Brienne had frolicked with Tormund.

Lastly, did the pull-back shot of Tyrion looking through the gaps in the wall remind anyone else of John Locke staring down the hatch at the end of Exodus? There was even a hint of a horn in the soundtrack. Loved it.

That got me thinking then about the differences and similarities between Lost and Game of Thrones. A whole separate blog post. Except to say that here we know what the show is building toward and where it’s ending. We’ve really known it most of the way. At least since Robert was killed. But with Lost we had no idea really right up until The End.

 

Westworld Season 2: Thoughts About This Mess

Of all the things I can’t handle in my TV shows, inevitability might be on top of the list. I can’t spend every episode of a series waiting for the most obvious thing to happen.

Take Westworld for an example. The moment Dolores killed the fly at the end of episode one made it obvious the hosts were going to realize they are hosts, and the odds were pretty good that we’d meet a host who didn’t know it was a robot. Such inevitability made it hard for me to take any joy in the show’s first season.

Enough people raved about it that I gave the show a quick re-watch, and I can see how people love it. I wouldn’t say I hate watch it the way I did The Leftovers, but I can’t say it’ll ever be a show I adore.

Here are my thoughts after three episodes of season two.

I’m okay with shifting timelines, but I need some kind of cue to tell me where we’re at. Putting a young Robert into the real-world scene in episode two helped, but I’d prefer to get the cue at the beginning so it’s easier to understand. Lost did this perfectly with the sound effect that signaled a transition to the flashbacks. Awake used warm and cold color treatments to tell viewers which reality its main character was experiencing. Westworld should do something similar. The timelines are too tight—weeks or days instead of years—for the characters to age, and the locations are exactly the same. They don’t have to throw a time card up on the screen, but some clear indication would be nice.

What was the main allure of season one? Watching the hosts become aware. Dolores figured it out. Maeve figured it out. Clementine could not handle, went zombie. Even Teddy, who rivals Revenge’s Daniel as one of the dumbest TV characters ever, figured it out. Now what? Aware Dolores is in a way even more of a drone than unaware Dolores. Her character has one focus that eliminates any depth she might have had. Wouldn’t it have been better if seeing what happened to her dad made her long for the simpler days when he was healthy and they were all happy? There’s an “ignorance is bliss” conflict there that could have put her character under a microscope by forcing her to question her new and murderous purpose. They passed and made her a military leader instead. Yawn.

It’s hard to be invested in the hosts’ fight against Delos when we only know three human Delos characters—Sizemore, Charlotte and Stubbs. The show hasn’t given any of them the time we need to have any sort of investment in their fate. We wanted Jon Snow to win the battle of the bastards because we love him and Ramsay was thoroughly detestable. Westworld hasn’t made us love the hosts or hate the humans, so I can’t care for the outcome of the conflict driving the story of its second season.

Where was William last week? More importantly, will that character even work now that we know he and the Gunslinger are the same? Yes, I think it will.

The show really suffers without Robert. They never made him a full-blown evil genius, but he was the central figure for every storyline to revolve around. Season one could ground storylines for the humans and the hosts in Robert. Without him, everything feels like it’s floating in the same space without anything to tie it all together. Maybe that’s the point…the park was under control with Robert and without him it spins out of control. He one-upped the board’s attempt to push him out of his creation in the most epic way possible: Writing a narrative that involved his own death to prove Westworld can’t exist without him.

I’m calling BS on the hosts making any sort of stand against the Delos security team. There’s no way old west shotguns could stand up to the weaponry Delos threw at them.

I like the idea of more parks with different themes. But at some point it’s going to be like okay, there’s no way one company can have enough money to do all this.

Why can’t they just give all the hosts clean hard drives? Wouldn’t that solve everything?